Fighting

I fight the fight with strength and dedication, I stand up for what is right and I don't back down. But how much more I can take, I'm quite uncertain. I feel like each time I take a step forward there's someone out there that seems determined to make sure I take seventeen steps back. I try to remain positive, but I feel like the world screams and emits negativity. I can't seem to keep my head up. I feel like I'm growing.

One person after another seems to want to fight me or drown me in negativity. I'm so ready to throw in the towel of life. Sorta. I really don't want to give in and give those other people that satisfaction. They surely don't deserve it.

Fighting gets so tiring. It seems like each time I win one battle, another one arises. And the battles that I've won, I don't really win, it just kind of gets resolved. I stick true to who I am and people claim that I'm unprofessional or something of the like, when they DON'T KNOW ME. I'm confused. It seems like there is misunderstanding and miscommunication everywhere I look right now. There just seems to always be someone who is unhappy. I awoke this morning with the inability to see a lot of positives in the day.

As I do when I start to feel as though there's not a single positive neuron in the universe I start to list the good of the day. My family is all still living, I woke up today, my husband and puppy dogs woke up today, everyone made it to work safely (as far as I know). I still have a job, and so does my husband. We won't have to worry about paying our bills. We're close to having the car paid off. I'm in good health and am bettering my health... um... what else. My recent tattoo addition is healing nicely. My car, my husbands car, etc, still run well and didn't have any issues this morning. In the absence of negative activity I do see a positive. My husband might not have felt well this morning, but it seems as though it is just a small bug and nothing serious. Even in his tummy troubles, he has a job that allows for leniency in his arrival to work so he was able to rest until he felt better. What else...? I don't know. I'm still willing to fight even with all the weight that seems to be dragging me down! That's a pretty big positive. I'm not willing to give in.

I'm going to fight.

I'm going to succeed!